When I went to my first rally, I met Donna. Donna, the most beautiful, wonderful, spiritual person who had ever come into my life. I instantly fell in love with her, IN love with her. I just didn't figure it out until eight months later. Regardless, I e-mailed her constantly, called her all the time. I want to be around her, in her presence; I wanted to be her. I wanted to be as beautiful, as wonderful, as spiritual. I put her on a pedestal and left her there for years. I quite frankly worshipped the ground that she walked on. At Conference 2002, Peace Be Still, she wrote me a note during the silence. She told me that it was all with in. Everything that I saw in her, that I wanted in her, was in me. I just had to remember, I just had to reach out and grasp it. It took time, but I realized it was true. Donna and I were equals, we always had been.

I am only human. I am only a water bottle holding God goodness within. I don't have all of the answers for you. As a Regi, people begin to put you on a pedestal from day one. They see you up on stage, personifying everything that Y.O.U. praises and they want to be like you. That’s not bad, its part of life. We find someone who we admire and we latch on. I've done it plenty of times, each time coming back to the realization that I cannot look outside of myself, I must look within. You have all of the answers that you need, you just have to find them. You just have to remember.

I am not the same person that you met at Balancing Act. I am new, I am different but I am still Becca. I evolve just as everyone else does. I am going through a period of deep reflection, I've discovered new things about me and I am coming to accept them and learn from them. You can't expect me to always be the same, to always have the answers, to always say the right thing. I am human. I am Rebecca.

I can't be responsible for your feelings or the way you take the words that I say. I am only responsible for myself and I feel like I said nothing wrong or negative. Maybe you feel like you are still in want because you haven't found it yourself. Maybe not. That’s up to you to decide.

I am no God, I am simply soul connected to spirit. So are you. Don't forget.

Take what you want from this, leave what you don't.

Feel Free and Good Bless