This too, shall pass...

K.C. and I broke up somewhere in the last 24 hours, though I'm not sure exactly when.

I called her last night and told her that when she moved to San Antonio that I felt we needed to part. She cried for an hour and a half while I sat there, helpless and sorry to have caused her pain. As I sat there I became more and more frusterated. I couldn't do anything to make her feel better nor could I make her stop crying. My own helplessness got the better of me and I began to scream at her. It didn't last very long but even that was to much. I got off the phone in daze and soon went to sleep, though I didn't do much of it.

Today I woke up, called her and arranged to come over. My emotions were churning and I wasn't quite sure what to do. I just knew that I had to see her, to attempt to explain and to help.

We layed on her bed, talking, holding each other. I felt like a bastard. I went through an amazing range of emotions. I was kissing her when I broke down. I realized that I couldn't do it anymore, I couldn't lie to her and I couldn't hurt her anymore. We sobbed in each others arms for two hours and I left, crying in my car.

I love her and she did nothing wrong, but I changed, I moved on and I did so without even knowing it. One day I woke up and it was gone, eviscerated in time. I'm sorry K.C., I'm sorry to put you through this pain but we both knew this would happen. We both knew that this day would come. I will always be here for you. I will always be here to help you. Namaste.